


The Night and The Dawn

by Steph1roth



Series: FFXV A.U. [2]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: F/M, M/M, Mixture of Cannon Ending and Episode Ignis endings, Multi, alertnate universe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-04-08
Packaged: 2019-03-29 19:01:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13933299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Steph1roth/pseuds/Steph1roth
Summary: In an AU where Noctis has a fraternal twin sister, Aurorae, who was born mute.  She was named after the dawn and in many ways, is the opposite of Noctis.  She is studious, hard-working and active, usually dragging her brother along and motivating him to work a little harder than he normally would.  Because they lost their mother at a young age and their father was often absent being king they became very close with one another.  Noctis learned sign language at the same time as his sister so when she is with him she doesn’t require an interpreter to tell people what she is saying.When Ignis was brought into the citadel part of the agreement of him being fostered was that he be betrothed to Regis’s daughter, Aurorae.  Growing up together Ignis also learned sign language to help him communicate with her as well.  Dealing with Noctis was always easier when his sister was around because she’d somehow get him to cooperate.  Ignis was her first real crush and that crush never really went away.The story is written from her perspective.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This story is being written in the tone of it being spoken. In some places it may jump, grammar may not be correct and there may be incomplete sentences. This is mostly in purpose so that the story flows as if you are listening to her think it or speak it. It is also written in first person. 
> 
> This is my first attempt at any sort of Final Fantasy Fictions.

Me and Ignis grew up together, most of our lives, while he was devoted to my brother and by that extension me.  I was told from a young age that I was bound to marry him.  I remember the day they told us.  It was just before mine and Noct’s tenth birthday.  He was 12 and being told he was betrothed to a ten-year-old mute girl and retainer to her brother whom was crowned prince.  He took the news in stride and I didn’t quite understand what it meant, not until much later. 

I smile when I think back on those times.  I think he, Ignis, worried that I’d be like my brother: Lazy, stubborn, unmotivated.  While I was certainly stubborn I was never lazy or unmotivated.  I had to work hard for everything.  Everyone took the privilege of speech for granted.  If someone ignored you, you could raise your voice and be heard.  If someone ignored me all they had to do was turn away.  I could not yell or scream or raise my voice.  The Astrals saw fit to take that from me before I was born.

He was always relieved that he didn’t have to worry about me eating healthy or studying or reading boring political reports and when Noct was with me he did it too, most of the time. I couldn’t say I was successful all the time but I was more successful than most. 

Because our mother when we were very young and father was often busy ruling all we had we each other.  We have always been close.  We spent all our waking moments together and even our sleeping ones as we would often sneak out of our rooms and sleep in the others.  So often this happened that if they found one of our rooms empty they didn’t panic until checking the other.  Noct learned sign language along with me.  It was a normal part of our lives that we didn’t question until reaching school age.  Why couldn’t we go to the same schools?  Why did I have to go to a special school?

This is where people take speech for granted.  I had to go to a school for deaf students, while there were others like me there, the vast majority of the students and teachers were deaf.  My schooling happened in silence most days with only the snapping of fingers or clapping of hands to get the attention of others.  I was picked on a lot by other kids, not by the ones in my school, but Glaives in training, Crownsguard recruits, children in the citadel or just on the street.  I wasn’t a pretty child or young child.  I kept my baby fat until I was fifteen. I was clumsy.  My hair either damp and lifeless or frizzy and out of control.  I was truly the ‘ugly duckling’. 

I knew as we got older that he wasn’t keen on the idea of me.  I wasn’t an attractive child, not like Noct, he had girls and boys swooning over him since he started school.  What I didn’t have in looks I made up for in dedication and patience and kindness.  While we grew up together me and Ignis weren’t terribly close until he hit puberty, well more like puberty hit him and hard, and wasn’t kind.  He took it all in stride, but I could see it took its toll, as it did on me.  The constant teasing and hurtful remarks always found a way of digging beneath the thickest of skins. 

 

* * *

 

_“Why would you want to marry her?”_   The words stuck me in the heart like piercing needles. _“She looks like a wilted marbol.”_

I remained perfectly still against the wall next to the open door of the training hall.  I was clutching the bento box I’d made so tightly to my chest that the cover caved in.

_“She can’t even talk!  How are you going spend the rest of your life with someone who can’t hold a conversation with you?”_

“That is quite-“

Everyone looked towards me in the doorway as the boxed lunch clattered to the floor.  I knew who they were talking about.  I wasn’t hard to figure that one out and I was a smart girl, even at fourteen I knew I wasn’t the prettiest girl.  I was on the chubbier side, clumsy, short and my hair was limp and often damp because it was really frizzy otherwise.  Tears burned my eyes.

“Speak of the-“ 

One of the older kids began.  He stopped mid-sentence with a withering glare that Ignis gave him.  I tried to keep my tears in check.  Sniffling as I bent down to pick up the lunch box and ruined food.  He tried to help me, but I was hurting, angry and assumed that he was going to say that he agreed with them, which in hindsight he’d never do. 

I slapped his hand away when he reached for the lid and his hand brushed mine.  A string of angry gestures flew from my hands and mouthed words I didn’t mean. A look of stunned hurt rolled over his face.  I can’t even remember what I said only that they were words spurred from anger and hurt.  I probably said something mean about his face.  He was pretty insecure about it at that point in his life.  Puberty was not kind to him. 

I could hear the other boys snickering as I all but ran down the hall throwing the lunch box in the nearest trash bin and my own steps echoing down the hall.  I wished horrible things on those boys in that moment of anguish and felt immediately bad afterwards.  It was no way for a princess to think about those in her kingdom even if they called her ugly. 

I wanted to scream and yell.  The endless frustration of a life of silent acceptance.  People could ignore me if they only looked away.  There was no way to vocalize my feelings. Tears flowed freely now in silent rivulets.  I took the servants halls back to my room.  Less people would see me that way, but there was no hiding from Noct.  He always knew when I was upset or hurt or angry and it went both ways.  He must have walked straight out of lesson because he barged into my room with his training gear still on and Gladio on his heels.

“What’s the big- “he stopped yelling at Noct when he saw my face.  Having a younger sister himself he understood what it felt like to see your sister in tears.  “ten-minute break.”  He said closing the door and Noct waving him off.

I looked away when Noct knelt in front of my bed with uncharacteristic softness.  He was always like that with me, no-one was quite as dear to him as I, except maybe Prompto but that was different.  Unable to get me to look at him he grabbed one of my plushies off the bed and started making it talk to me.  He had a voice for every one of them all centered to make me smile or laugh.  Once a smiled at him he’d put it down and ask me what happened. It was always the same.  People calling me names. Usually it didn’t get to me this bad but Ignis was there and I was said some terrible things to him out of anger.

“You don’t look like a withered marbol.”  He said squeezing my hand.  “Look, Iggy can hold a conversation with you just fine.  He doesn’t even need me to translate anymore.” He frowned at the pained look on my face.  “What?”

My fingers told the story of my words.  I saw him frown. 

“I’m sure he knew you didn’t mean it.  But you gotta apologize, okay?”  I nodded.  “You gonna be okay?”  he asked, again I nodded, though I wasn’t sure honestly. “I gotta get back.  See you for dinner.” 

I nodded again and pushing him towards the door.  I knew Gladio was impatient.  He’d be back if Noct didn’t hurry back.  I wanted to be alone for a while anyway.  Laying back on my bed I laid there for an hour or so before making my way to the kitchens.

 

* * *

 

We avoided each other for a few days.  We both were angry and hurt, well by now it was mostly hurt.   I saw him in the hall.  His hair still damp from showering and his face had a sheen on it from the medication for his skin.  He must have been scrubbing it hard as it was all red and angry looking.  He’d get scars if he scrubbed it that hard. 

I sighed.  Well I made the motions.  No sound to announce my presence.

He whirled when I tapped him on the shoulder.  It wasn’t often I was able to sneak up on him.  The look of surprise was replaced from one that was both stoic and sad.  I knew I’d hurt his feelings.  There was no denying that.  He watched me sign at him, at least he didn’t look away and ignore me, he’d hear me out before leaving.  I apologized.  I didn’t mean what I said.  I was upset and angry.  I asked him to forgive me. If we were still friends.

“Of course, we are still friends.”  He replied after a moment. He shifted his weight setting his gear on the floor. “We all say things we don’t mean out of anger.” 

A blush crept across his face when I pointed out that he scrubbed his face too hard.  Making his skin raw wouldn’t make it clearer.  I offered him a small container.

“What is this?” I waited for him to look back at me before speaking.  It was a paste made from various plants, mostly flowers, that helped promote healing.  I told him that when they said I’d have a horrendous scar I used it to soften it.  It was nearly invisible now. “Th-thanks.  I’ll try it.”


	2. Homecoming: Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is still a little awkward but its coming together. It may be a little slow until I get into a good rhythm with it.

After that day we became a lot closer.  Banding together against the mutual teasing at least until I was offered a scholarship at one of the most prestigious schools in Insomnia for gifted students.  It wasn’t because I was a princess but they felt that I could truly contribute to the community and kingdom.  They were grooming me to be a translator, interpreter, ambassador.  I was gone for two years, not really gone, Insomnia is a huge city, but I was on the _other_ side of it.  Our lives were so busy that was hardly any time to see one another. A few times Noct and Prompto or Noct and Gladio would take the train to come see me on the weekends.  Usually me and Noct video chatted, sometimes he’d forget he could actually speak and be frantically signing about his day or some new video game.  He’d stop when I started giggling silently.  He’d blush super hard once he realized why I was laughing at him. 

Sometimes I’d see his friends Prompto and Gladiolus at his apartment.  Prompto has a habit of pushing Noct out of the way or stealing his seat when he got up and flirt with me.  I think he learned to sign just so he could understand me.  He’d send me photos to paint and I’d send him my paintings.  Gladiolus would wave or call at me from across the room.  Ignis, however, always seemed to be too busy to come sit down or in the times that he did have a moment he was awkwardly hard to get to converse with me. 

I guess people just drift apart.  It was heartbreaking at first, after a year it just faded into a dull ache, I stopped asking if he was there even if I could hear him.  He didn’t seem to want to talk to me.  Maybe he’d found someone.  The thought broke my heart on many levels.  I loved him, I always had, it grew far beyond familial as I got older.  But what about the other person?  He was promised to me.  Couldn’t really go against the king.  I couldn’t blame him for finding someone, if he did, I may have too if I didn’t harbor deep feelings for him. 

I was mostly able to ignore it while I was there.  I had so much to do that there was little time to think about my impending marriage or the fact my promised groom probably didn’t want me.  I finished my degree in two years instead of four.  A testament to how hard I worked.  I also wanted to go home.  Two days before our seventeenth birthday I called Noct.  I was so excited I could hardly sit still.  Bouncing in my seat.

 _“What’s got you bouncing?”_ He asked from the monitor.

I smiled widely.  I was so giddy that my hands were shaking.  I had to type out that I was coming home.

 _“You’re coming home!”_ I heard him say a tad too loud for the time of night.  Out of the corner of the screen I could see Ignis’s head peek around the corner. _“Hey Specs, Aurorae’s coming home tomorrow.”_ He called to the man in the kitchen.  I watched the tiny form nod and disappear again. I kept my smile wide and bright for Noct but my heart sank into the pit of my stomach.

_My train arrives at 9am. Don’t be late._

I heard him groan. _“Why so early?”_

 _Don’t be late._ I repeated giving him a stern look. 

 _“I won’t.”_   he grumbled waving his hand at me dismissively.

 _Go to sleep._ I told him before shutting my laptop.

The silence ate at me.  I should be happy to go home and for the most part I was.  I simply dreaded the reason why he’d been avoiding me for two years.  The thought of talking to father about calling the arrangement off crept in my mind again, unbidden.  If he was involved with someone it would be the fair thing to do.  Someone else suitable could be found that could be convinced to take a mute bride.  Laughing at myself I wondered how many husbands wished their wives were truly mute. 

I don’t remember how long I laid there in the dark, but at some point, I fell into a dreamless sleep, waking early to get ready and say my goodbyes to the friends I’d made.  Exchanging numbers and promising to keep in touch.  I spent more time than I’d really like to admit standing in front of my mirror staring at my clothes.  While I hadn’t grown much taller than when I left I had grown out in other ways.  Lost most of my ‘baby fat’ for one, whatever hormonal garbage was causing my hair to freak out had stopped and where an ugly duckling had once stood now was a swan.  Swan was the nickname I picked up here from the people who watched my change during the last two years.  It made me feel better seeing how ugly swan chicks were before they turned into the beautiful, graceful creatures they were as adults.

I opted for something fashionable.  An off the shoulder top with black swirling designs with belled sleeves and a pair of form fitting jeans.  Not to sound terribly vain but they made my ass look fantastic.  My boots gave me a boost of about two inches, which still put me at four inches shorter than Noct.  I was barely over five feet tall and my height still made me self-conscious.  In the few times that Noct found the time to come visit me he’d often used me as an arm rest, good-natured jesting of course, but it was still super aggravating.

Despite the embarrassing amount of time I spent in front of the mirror making sure my clothing, hair and makeup was perfect I made it to the train station on time.  It took eight minutes to get from my school to the citadel district.  Stepping off the train it wasn’t hard to spot my brothers car idling nearby.  I was surprised that Ignis accompanied him being sure he’d send Cor or Gladio with him. It made me happy to see him in person and not peeking through a computer screen.  I didn’t have time for much more than a passing glance and a nod before Noct assaulted me.  Wrapping his arms around me he lifted me clear off the ground in a rare display of genuine joy.

It had me swatting at his shoulders trying to get him to put me down.  Either he’d gotten stronger or I had gotten lighter considering how easily he’d lifted me and held me there.  I was aware of Ignis putting my bags in the car and it wasn’t until the truck closed with a resounding **thud** that he put me down. I gave him a flat, unimpressed look.  He only laughed turning back to the car where Ignis stood holding the door open.  I gave Ignis a soft smile as I climbed in the car after him.  I heard him clear his throat and adjust his glasses.  He looked nervous.  I wondered why.

The car ride to Noctis’s new apartment was full of him talking about this new game him and Prompto were playing and how happy he was not to be living alone.  I smiled.  He simply assumed, though correctly, that I would be staying with him and opted for a two-bedroom apartment. 

Snapping at him to get his attention.  _Did Prompto like the camera?_

“Y-yeah.”  He said a blush starting to creep up his face.  “He, uh, guessed it was your idea but he appreciated that it came from me.”

I couldn’t help but smile.  Their crush for each other was something precious and though it wasn’t a popular opinion I encouraged it.  He may be the crowned prince but he didn’t have to marry for politics, I’d do that for him, so he could be free to choose. 

“Did you, um, bring your Cello?”  he asked. I nodded. “Good.  Specs likes classical music.”

_Does he now?_

My smile faded a little, but he didn’t seem to notice, which was fine because I didn’t really want to talk about it.

 

* * *

 

The rest of the ride was in companionable silence.  I smiled at the doorman as he held the door open for me.  Most of my things had been would be arriving within the next day or so and I only brought what I wanted immediately which was mostly my clothing, boxing gear, bathroom supplies and my Cello.  His apartment was spacious and mostly empty.  He had furniture but very little adorning the walls.  The living room and kitchen was, mostly clean, but his room I’m sure was a mess.

“Hey specs can you show her around. I have to get to the citadel for practice.”

“Of course, Noct.” His voice was carefully neutral. “Gladio would not take kindly to you being late again.”

I waved goodbye to Noct and stood in awkward silence with him tapping my fingers on the case of my Cello. There were only so many rooms in this place, we both knew that, Noct left us alone together on purpose.  I was equal parts annoyed and grateful.   Even if I knew which one would be mine I waited for him to speak first.

“This way,” there was a slight hesitation in which I could tell he was debating whether to use my name or a title.

 _My nickname is Swan, if that is easier._    That was my ice breaker.

“Swan?”

  _I left an ugly duckling and found I wasn’t a duck at all, but a swan._  

Leaning my Cello against the couch I got up on my tippy toes I stretched just barely enough to leave a chase kiss on the underside of his jaw.  I felt him tense up the moment my lips contacted his jaw.  It wasn’t a bad reaction.  He didn’t appear to have hated the interaction though it was obvious it surprised him.  I couldn’t help but smile at the blush that dusted his cheeks.  I moved before he could respond grabbing my Cello case and heading for the only other room in the apartment.


	3. Homecoming: Lunch at the Citadel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aurorae/Swan has lunch at the Citadel with the King.

I had plans to spend the morning and afternoon at the Citadel on our birthday.  Noct still had school, which he whined about, citing that it was unfair that I didn’t have to go.  I told him if he’d finished school like I did he wouldn’t have to go, but he’s a lazy boy so off to school!  He pouted the whole way downstairs to the car. 

The whole way to school he rattle away about the new game he’d gotten for their party tonight and how Ignis was going to make them all special treats.  I had missed watching and listening to him talk with such open enthusiasm.  He was normally so reserved around everyone else, save me and Prompto, it was nice to actually see him smile and not through a computer screen. 

“Why do I have to go to school?  And you don’t?”  he whined again.

 _As I said earlier._ I paused to straighten his uniform. _If you weren’t so lazy you could have finished school when I did, but you enjoy sleeping and arcades way too much for that. And it is not like I will be lazing about.  I have lunch with father, a wedding planner to meet and several meetings to sit in on with Ignis._

He looked at me. I smiled at him.

_What?_

“I am glad that its him.”  He said quietly. “That you are going to marry.”  I looked at him giving him that ‘oh?’ expression and waiting for him to elaborate. “I trust him…with everything and that means you too.” 

Turning away from Noct I watched him in the rear-view mirror as we drove.  It was nice, well more than nice, to know that Noct held my life in such high regard. 

The stopping of the car in front of his school.   I Pushed him out of the open car door.

_I’ll see you tonight._

 

* * *

 

I stayed in the back of the car, even if I’d rather be in the front where I could see him, as the door closed.  I watched him walk around the car and reenter the driver’s seat.  Observing him adjust his glass.  He looked in the rear-view mirror and our eyes met briefly.  I smiled.  He cleared his throat and looked away back to the road.  Classical music started to filter out of the speakers in the back.  Leaning my head against the window frame I watched the morning traffic as we made our way to the Citadel. 

Unaccustomed to having someone open doors for me I was half-way out of the car before Ignis had reached the passenger side. He looked almost embarrassed like he’d been too slow.  It reminded me just how different mine and Noct’s lives were.  I told him I’d see him later before we parted ways.  Entering the Citadel on my own for the first time in nearly two years had the staff talking.  Not just because I had returned but my lack of retainers and more importantly a Shield.  It was a stark and stabbing reminder that my life would never be as important as his.  I did not doubt that our father loved me, I know he did dearly, but it still stung being so expendable when compared to Noct.

It had never been so clear to me as it was while I was away.  There was no Crownsguard watching over me at my school.  No chamberlain to clean up my room, do my laundry or cook for me.  I’d never thought about it because Gladiolus was always there, for both of us, then I realized he was only there for Noct.  Their duty was to him not me.  I was on my own.  Seeing now the servants and staff walking about at hurried paces: cleaning, cooking, preparing.  I couldn’t help but feel bitterness threatening to spoil what was supposed to be a happy day for me. 

Father was still busy in the council when I arrived.  Sitting outside the chamber on the plush cushioned seats my thoughts wandered to the last two years of my life.  I was capable, independent, well-educated and driven. Everything I had I worked for and hard.  Learned how to sew, to cook, to iron.  Everything that Noct had done for him I learned to do on my own.  Maybe it wasn’t the worst thing in the world to be put second to Noct, even if it the knowledge still stung.

I’d lost track of how much time had passed, but my butt had long gone numb from sitting for so long, the opening door of the council chambers pulling me back into reality.  I watched the council members file out of the room.  I was invisible to them.  Perhaps a blessing, if a bitter one, I saw things that others didn’t because no one realized I was there watching.  I waited for the last of them to filter out before slipping in through the open door.  I couldn’t help but smile seeing my father and his Shield huddled close is quiet conversation. 

“I do believe we have a guest, Majesty.” 

Clarus noticed me first.  Smiling brightly at him any bitterness that may have been lingering melted away when I saw my father smile. 

“Aurorae, my light.”

He said making his way to me.  We embraced tightly.  He looked so much older than when I’d last saw him.  The magic he used carved deep lines into his skin making him look much older than he really was.  His hair was mostly gray now.  He used a cane now and wore a brace on his left leg.  It made my heart ache knowing that it was unlikely he’d live to see any of his grandchildren. 

“You look so much like your mother.” I could hear the touch of sadness in his voice but it was mostly joy.  He took a step back from me to see the young woman I’d become.  “You’ve grown up so much.”

 _I am ready for my duties to the crown._ My hands said.

It wasn’t what he meant but it was why I was back here.  Learning to lead a kingdom from the passenger seat.  I always wondered why we couldn’t just lead together.  We were the same age and both capable.  It just wasn’t in the stars I guess.

“Duties.”  He said nodding. “Ignis will be showing you what is required.  As his wife-to-be you two should start working together. You should meet with him today.”  I smiled at him nodding. “Let us talk about that another time, I think I owe my daughter a lunch.”

I let him lean on me as we walked to the gardens to eat.  As always Clarus was nearby, another reminder, I had no one to watch over me.  I pushed those thoughts away and focused on enjoying lunch with my father.  We talked about idle things: my classes, my life away from home, my choice (unsurprising) choice to live with Noct.  As lunch was winding down, I’d spent a better part of the afternoon there, I gave him a soft kiss on the cheek. 


	4. Reflections

Meeting with the tailor was a time consuming and exhausting affair.  It took the rest of the day.  We had to wait for a translator because I wasn’t writing everything down, which took some time because I hadn’t needed one in years, but once they arrived things went faster.  I was fairly certain that Noct was involved in who they sent as it was Ignis who showed up to speak for me.  I couldn’t suppress my amused chuckle when he walked in and I kept smiling at the blush that stained his cheek when he realized I was standing there on a pedestal in my underwear in front of three mirrors.  Well it wasn’t revealing underwear, more like boy shorts and a sports bra, still was far more skin than he was used to seeing on anyone. 

There was a team of five seamstresses attending me and they all had their own ideas.  While they were in the back at a table arguing over colors and cuts and what to do about my scars I absently answered questions.  No, I would not stop working out.  No, I will not cover my scar.   

“The Princess wishes it known that she will not stop working out nor will she cover her scars.”  Ignis relayed her message trying his best not to stare at my reflection if I was doing the same thing.

He stood awkwardly behind me doing his best to both pay attention should I need something said, read his reports _and_ not stare.  I caught him several times stealing glances at the three large reflections of me.  Honestly, I didn’t mind, unlike Noct I didn’t care if my scars were seen.  They were a reminder that I survived something I should not have.  That daemon cleaved me nearly in two.  Starting from the point between the neck and shoulder and ending in the center of my chest.  The scar was large and white against my skin with dark gray lines that spidered out like cracks in glass.  I should be dead.  Twice over.  Once from the wound itself and twice from the Starscourge I contracted from it.

I began to trace the scar with my opposite hand.  I hardly felt anything on that side.  The damage to the nerves there never truly healed even with Lady Sylvia’s help.  I had to be careful with my left side from my shoulder to my fingertips, my sense dulled to an almost dangerous level.  I once had a compound break that I didn’t feel or notice until I saw blood. Also unlike Noct I remember everything that happened quite clearly.  I wasn’t not blessed with a faulty memory. 

They say it was a miracle that I survived.  I never fought that explanation even if deep inside I knew it was something else.  I couldn’t say what, but something else intervened that day, my magic snapped awake long before Noct ever manifested his.  I remembered the car explosion.  The warm blood from our nursemaid washing over us.  Noct crying out.  He was injured.  I stood in front of him and stared that daemon down.  I thought I was going to die when the first swing came raining down but I didn’t.  Everything had been oddly silent.  Having thrown my arm over my head in a futile attempt to protect myself I found a glittering barrier, a shell, surrounding us and the Daemon angerly assaulting it.  Each hit draining a bit more from me.  I knew I couldn’t hold it for long.  I looked but at Noct.  Maybe long enough for him to survive. 

“-Highness?”

My focus returning to the present.  I watched his reflection behind mine.

“Is everything all right?”  I could hear the concern in his voice.

I nodded.  I must have begun to sway.  Lost in my thoughts.  I gave him a quizzical look in the mirror.  Since when did he start calling me highness?  I wondered.  When did we grow so apart?  I wondered if two years was long enough to become strangers with someone you’ve known your whole life.

Staring at his reflection in the mirror suddenly wasn’t good enough.  Taking a small step back on the pedestal the seamstresses had me on I turned to face him.  The pedestal put me at eye level with him. My stare was intense enough that even he started to shift his weight from foot to foot and adjusting his glasses just to have something to fidget with.

_Are we strangers now?_

“Pardon?” I could hear the surprise in his voice. “I fear I do not understand the question.”

 _Since when you have ever called me Highness?_ I asked, my word sounded angry in my head and it came out in the animations of my hand gestures.  They were fast, harsh and had me mouthing my words, which made me appear to be breathing hard as that was the only sound coming out. It wasn’t how I wanted to have this conversation with me standing mostly naked on a pedestal in only the most prestigious tailor in Insomnia, but it was a flood gate I couldn’t close now.  _What had I done to turn you away from me?_ My questions kept coming in succession not even giving him time to respond.  I was normally so poised and calm.  _You’ve avoided me for two years Ignis.  Two years.  Now you won’t even use my name.  Either of them._

I felt my breaths coming in short, angry bursts.  I hated every moment of it.  I hated being angry, being hurt and in that moment, I hated that he caused it and I had no idea why.

“This isn’t the place-“

I stamped my foot in frustration, yes it was childish I know, if I could I would have screamed.  Shouted.  Anything to make my feelings known.  I was tired to being ignored and told that it wasn’t the time or he was too busy.

 I recognized the hard look that was cast over his eyes.  It was the same look that he used when Noct was being a child.  It wasn’t the same though.  Noct had a voice.  Tension causing my jaw to ache.

“Are you a child now?”  He asked, anger masking whatever he may have felt before, it was a quiet sort of anger, the kind that put a hard edge on his voice.  Like a harsh rebuke from a parent. “Stamping your feet when you don’t get your way?”

He knew he’d gone too far the moment the word left his mouth.  Words are funny like that.  Once out they can’t be put back in.  I chewed on my thoughts carefully in the long, harsh silence between us. 

“My apologies-“he began, but fell short as I continued to stare at him.

_I have no more need of your services today, Master Scientia. You are dismissed._

Turning my back on him I stared at the floor until I heard the door close.   By the time my gaze had returned to the mirror he was long gone and the women had returned.  They were a little disappointed that the handsome young advisor was gone but more than happy that I was being much more complacent.   The truth was I didn’t have the energy to fight with them over every little detail.  I just said I’d think about it and took their ungodly huge books of samples. 

With Ignis gone I had to text Cor and ask him to send someone to pick me up.  I sat in the waiting area of the store holding the heavy books on my lap and staring absently out the window.  I saw one of the Crownsguard cars pull into a street side spot but for whatever reason my body refused to move.  I just sat there staring out the window dumbly until the sound of swooning and chattering women filled the silence like shrills of a harpy. 

“I thought Ignis was with you.”

His voice was harsh and abrasive.  He didn’t mean anything by it, it was just his way, but still the harshness of Marshal’s tone made me flinch.  I hear him exhale and then he reached down and tool the heavy books from my lap.  Tucking the books under one arm he offered to other to me, albeit awkwardly.  The effort brought a smile to my lips.  Taking his hand, I let him help me stand. 

He nodded politely to the still fawning women in the store as he held the door open for me.  I heard him breath out another long breath once we were free of the grasping eyes of the women in the store.  The way they looked at him.  It was like watching griffin’s circling a fresh kill, just waiting to descend.  It was shameless and I felt bad for him.  For being in his mid-forties he was still a very attractive man. 

I opted to sit in the front seat rather than the back.  If it were my brother he may have insisted that he sit in the back for safety, but Noct would have sat in the back on his own accord.  I did not wish to be alone. 

_You did not have to come yourself._

“It is no trouble.” I nodded at his reply watching him fasten his seatbelt. “Where to?” he asked looking at me.

_Home._


	5. Downpour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This will be short one. After struggling with first person these last chapters, trying something new, I find that the story just isn't flowing the way I want. So I'm going change the voice to third person but still focusing on Aurorae, mostly, and any dreams will be in first person.

The ride home was quiet.  Cor wasn’t the most talkative man in the best times, only speaking when something needed to be said, so the silence wasn’t unexpected.  I was happy that he came himself even if I felt guilty for interrupting his already busy schedule.  I stared at the dash with the city passing by in my peripheral.  It had started to rain.  Beads of the water blurring the world and casting the world in a grey haze.  It seemed fitting that it would rain considering my mood.

When the car stopped to remained seated.  Cor hesitated to watch me, when it was evident I wasn’t going to get out on my own he stepped out of the car and opened an umbrella.  He’d also taken my books again under his arm.  Opening the door for me he kept the umbrella over me while we walked to the covered front door of mine and Noct’s apartment building. 

I let him open all the doors from me until we reached my front door.  I sighed pulling my keys out.  Turning the lock, I was relieved to find the place empty.  I was tired, physically and emotionally, and didn’t want to try and explain it to anyone else.  Turning to Cor I smiled at him.  I tried to not make it forced, it was small, but genuine.  Taking the books from him I squeezed his arm in thank you. 

He seemed hesitant to leave but after a few moments he gave me the barest hint of a smile and left. I’ve never seen him smile for anyone else.  I wondered why that was, but I was too exhausted to ponder the possibilities.  Closing the door, I barely remembered to lock it again, I left the heavy books on the table and retreated to my room. 

Once alone my room I slid down the smooth wood door until I was sitting on the floor.  Despair overcame me like a tidal wave and with it hot, angry tears and silent screams.  I hated every moment of it.  It was exhausting and heart breaking.  I don’t know exactly how long I sat on the floor, leaning aginst the door listening to the rain on the roof and the wind howling as it assaulted the windows. It must have been hours that I sat alone in silence because Noct and Prompto weren’t supposed to be back until much after six-o-clock.  I heard the boys enter.  Their loud and cheerful chatter was almost enough to draw me out and had it been just them I may have.  I heard heavier footsteps.  Gladiolus must have driven them here.  I wasn’t surprised that he was here, it was Noct’s birthday too, it would be foolish to think he wouldn’t come over to celebrate.  I simply didn’t feel like celebrating.

There was a soft knock at my door.  I knew it was Noct.  I’d recognize the rap of his knuckles against any door.  Sighing I moved slowly away from the door and opened it about a foot, an invitation to come in.  Stepping inside he closed the door behind me. I could see the concern on his face.  Even if he didn’t have an uncanny ability to known when I was I upset or having a nightmare he knew something was wrong.  Cor must have said something.

“Everything okay?”  he asked softly.  “Cor said he brought you home.  I thought Ignis was with you.”

So, he did say something, but didn’t elaborate. I wanted to say that everything was fine and to enjoy the night but I couldn’t bring myself to lie to him. I shook my head no. When the tears started again in earnest he stepped forward pulling me into his chest.  He didn’t ask any more questions, at the moment it didn’t matter why, just that I was upset and needed comfort.  He maneuvered us to my bed and got us laid down without really letting go.  He just laid there with me until I stopped crying and fell asleep.


End file.
